by Sylvia Ford George

Picture Idris Elba, Lance Gross, Flavor Flav, Shemar Moore, Nelly, RayJ, Eddie Murphy, Zac Effron, Maxwell, Hill Harper, George Clooney, Michael Ealy, Malik Yoba and Questlove in a line up where you get to pick the guy that best fits your idea of a beautiful man. Who you gonna choose? Go through a process of elimination by removing the men with the age, height, size and hue you do not prefer. How many are left? What do you choose next to get you to your number one? Style? Swag? Sexiest eyes? Strongest face? Prettiest smile? Deepest voice? Best personality? Best haircut? Best body? How different would your choice be if they were topless or in swim trunks? Could you make a decision? Would you make a decision, or just stand there as long as you can, oohhing and ahhhing the possibilities?

The choice is yours but what it all boils down to, regardless of how politically correct people try to be, is that looks and outward appearance count volumes when it comes to how we view people (and how they view us). When you first see someone, your mind makes an instantaneous decision based on how you interpret beauty. Your interpretation could be swayed by celebrities with make-up artists, hair stylists and personal trainers who help them look their best when they step out the door. Or it could be swayed by the folks you work with, live with, commute with, party with, or run into at the mall. Either way we all have our own sense of what’s beautiful to us. Our idea may not always line up with someone else’s but that’s okay because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. That’s why Flavor Flav is in the above list. He’s not my ideal… but he could be yours.

When it comes to relationships beauty is everything, but it’s not just the beauty you see. It’s what you get from being with someone special; from caring the utmost for someone—just as they care about you; and that special feeling you get when they’re around. The beauty of a relationship is a combination of qualities that are pleasing, impressive to listen to, touch and look at. The beauty of a relationship is personal, physical, useful and satisfying. The beauty of a relationship is it’s ability to withstand the test of time, to stay focused and charged up. The beauty of a relationship is the connection between two people and the ability to love and be loved, for better or worse, through good and bad times. The beauty in a relationship is being able to choose the right person, with the right amount of beauty and the qualities that are ideal and appealing to you, (and vice versa).

Knowing what you like and being able to identify it is half the battle when it comes to finding your ideal beauty… in a mate and in a relationship. The above is just a fun way to get you thinking about what your beautiful man type is. Personally I like Malik Yoba’s height and size, George Clooney’s age, Maxwell’s old hair, and Lance Gross’ smile and smooth skintone. So I guess I’d end up with… Idris Elba. Who did you end up with?